Why are we sinners?

I have always been fascinated by psychology and how our minds work. It is so easily compatible with religion as well. Have you ever thought about why we sin? Is it because we don't know any better? Is it because people are inherently bad or good? Is it because since we are human we cannot help ourselves?

Since we were created in the image of God and with knowledge and understanding, I think humans are far too complex to be labelled simply as good or evil. If anything, since we are similar to God, I think people are predisposed to be good. I think conditions can cause you to make certain choices, but ultimately there is always a reason. I used to think sin was horrible because Satan was pushing it on us or we just hate God, but now I understand it so much more deeply. I read this article that said,"sin is often an attempt to meet legitimate needs apart from God". When we are not close to the spirit we do not have His presence as strongly in our lives, and this means that certain needs he usually fills are not being met. We would not be receiving the level of understanding, charity, relief from pain, and any other number of blessings from him. Sin is just us seeking out solutions to these needs. Satan does not make us desire these things, he just gives us opportunities to find other solutions. Some sins are not inherently evil, they are just the product of a lack of a relationship with God. The fact that we have certain needs that can only be met by a higher being is evidence of a life beyond! Most of the needs that we have cannot be fulfilled by the imperfect people of this earth, only by some other force. This whole idea has allowed me to be more understanding of others, as well as forgive the sins that I have committed. It also allows me to see others sins and have an idea of how to help them because I know what they are missing. This is one of my greatest desires, to be able to read people and have a deep understanding of what they need and what I can provide to them.

I have also been reading so much about knowledge. There is this one podcast by Shelby Stanger and presented by REI that takes on so many inspiring guests. A couple of them have shared thoughts about knowledge and learning. One quote REALLY stuck out to me.

Do not strive to be interesting, rather be interested.

Holy moly!!! This is huge. Knowledge is so important to God, and without it, what is there in this world? We were sent here to understand the secrets of the beautiful earth and about each other, to truly understand as God does. This quote struck me so hard because one of my deepest fears is that I am not interesting enough for people to like me or be of any worth. What I have been realizing lately is that it doesn't matter if you try to make yourself interesting, it won't work. You will become 10x more interesting by being interested, and learn so much more. "Wisdom is better than rubies; and all the things that may be desired are not to be compared to it". This is literally the entire reason we are here! To learn how to become Gods! And this is through love and understanding. Mercy and charity, and all values that are of God. God is so good!

Been a couple years!

Committing my words to paper (or post?) is the only thing this semester than has made me feel understood. Since coming to college I have struggled immensely to find those that I feel understand me. I have been seeking validation from other sources outside myself, when I need to look inward so that I can express outward. Since I posted last, I went through a complete loss of faith and interest in religion. I am grateful for this season. That dark time in my life had some great memories, but also led me to where I am right now. I learned so many lessons about repentance and sin and Christ. I felt his unending love so deeply. Now, my goal is to express that to others. I overanalyze everything so I am trying to not react to people, but use compassion. I have been reading the Bible so much more and finding little spots of inspiration more so than the Book of Mormon, but that is probably just this stage of my journey of faith. On the topic of love there are multiple golden verses. In 1 James chapter 4 it says "Love is of God; and every one that liveth is born of God, and knoweth God". This verse gives me so much hope. It represents the united and all encompassing care that God has for each on one us, and tells us that every person who loves is of God. Its similar to the fruit metaphor, if the tree bears good fruit, it is of God. This means that every person that loves someone else, no matter the gender or orientation, has a pure love. That it is not wrong, but actually God like. It also shows that christianity is not meant to be one of judgement as I think the majority of the world believes and practices, but is about acceptance and building each other up. It also says in verse 11, "If god so loved us, we ought also to love one another". Wow. This addresses directly our human downfall of a judgement that is unwarranted and ungodly. Who are we to discriminate who receives love? Who are we to say that one is better than another? Everything we do is done from our own perspective, not the greater one above. I believe that we are not seeing the full picture. I think it also important to address this other yet similarly profound principle, "there is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear". Every bad relationship I have been in where I was afraid to show my full emotions and held back, those were not Godly relationships. In a true and complementary partnership, even friendships, both members should feel like they have cheerleaders surrounding them. Friends and partners that allow them to reach their full potential and are grateful to have them in their lives. Some of the best friendships I have I am still able to be my funny self, but they can see beyond that and sense the deeper parts of my identity. This leads me into the next thought. This really got me. Proverbs 4:23 says, " keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life". It is literally telling us that life is deeper and that it is all about emotions and relationships!!! It is telling us to ignore all the craziness around us and take care of our heart, this means doing things that are nourishing to us as well as making hard decisions to let things go. I think this verse often gets misinterpreted as meaning guard your heart and don't let people in, but I think it means the opposite. I think its actually saying to take care of your heart and emotions and value them so that you can use it to its full capacity for love.  This kind of unrestrained love and expression is what I live for, its one of the reasons that I feel connected to Jesus, is because I just feel so passionate about living deeply. I feel like his gospel is the perfect example of this because of what he did for us. The ultimate dramatic move was to die for us. It shows His full devotion to us, even when we do not deserve it. It has only been hitting me lately how much joy can be found. This is why Christ died for us! It was not so that we would feel guilty forever, its the opposite! He took our guilt and pain so that we could experience the deep and passionate joy that He desires for His brothers and sisters!!!!! God is so good!